Modern dating style in china

In her weekly workshops that have attracted thousands, Wu lectures about how to negotiate with a partner, how to confront parental demand to get married, and even on subjects like sex and birth control.Salsa dancing is a big part of the training, Wu says, because dancing loosens up shy individuals and the music puts them in the mood right away."Chinese people don't know how to date.Challenges remain to get to this level, but both Wu and Joy Chen are optimistic: they believe the term "leftover women" will disappear in the next decade as more women remain single after age 27.

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When she was younger, Ji's requirements for a spouse were focused on practical matters, like income, family background, height, and education. "My parents told me to get married first, and that love can be nurtured later," says Ji.

Marriage based on economic status is normal in China.

Thousands of years of culture and tradition have labeled women who are neither a wife nor a mother as social outcasts.

For the post-80 generation -- one that was caught in the transition between traditional and modern China -- the term "leftover women" is especially suitable.

My boyfriend appeared at the right time, and he had the right economic profile," Ji says. But it didn't take long for the marriage to fall apart, and three years later Ji filed for divorce.

Part of the problem, she realized, was how she went about finding a partner.

They want attraction, and their parents don't know what that is."Wu isn't the only one with that idea.

Last year, Alex Edmunds, a 26-year-old Princeton graduate living in Beijing, founded Coucou8, an online dating site that hosts affordable small group events like dinner, cooking classes, hiking, and afternoon tea for singles over the age of 26.

Ever since, the government has invested a lot of effort in marrying off these women by running large-scale matchmaking events."All media are controlled and censored by the government, so when the government wants to send a very strong propaganda message, that message is extremely effective," Fincher says, "The majority of women are still internalizing this ideology.

They are genuinely very afraid that if they don't marry by the time they turn 30, they won't find a husband."According to Joy Chen, however, Chinese culture has played a role in pressing women into marriage long before the arrival of the Communist Party.

Membership has grown by 10 attendees per month since April."China has a very hardworking culture, so there isn't much momentum for people to go to social events and meet people outside of their work environment," Edmunds says, "So what we have to do is bring in a different culture around initial dates and meetings that encourage people to meet based on their personalities and interests."***Both Wu and Edmunds are targeting China's "leftover women," a new term describing educated, urban women over 27 who are disadvantaged not just by society's perception they're "too old" for marriage, but also because their successful careers and economic security intimidate prospective suitors.

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