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The whole purpose of spending time together is for mutual enjoyment. You start talking about life goals, your ideas of marriage, if you want to have children and how many, your career plans, your spiritual beliefs, your family background.
Dating for Fun Goal: Enjoyment This type of dating is the no-strings-attached type of dating. That purpose is for you and her to get to know each other, to see if you both want to move into a more serious relationship.
When we first studied online dating habits in 2005, most Americans had little exposure to online dating or to the people who used it, and they tended to view it as a subpar way of meeting people.
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While dating, you have her attention and she has yours. (Also read: 10 Fun Date Night Ideas) Having clarity about which type of dating you are doing is helpful not just for me, but for yourself (and your date), so you can figure out what the heck is going on.
You can use this time to catch each other up on what has happened in the week, observe how the other person may have changed recently, have important conversations, and make decisions. Many relationship problems I’ve seen stem from couples not being on the same page about what type of dating they are doing (i.e.
When a friend tells me that he or she is dating, I usually ask them to explain what exactly they mean by the word “dating.” When they give me a blank stare, I prompt them by asking: Is it casual dating? But at this stage of dating, they are not ready to pick up and move to the other person’s city. Courtship) Goal: Making a yes or no decision about marriage The old-fashioned name of this type of dating is called “courtship.” During courtship, a couple gets to know each other for the purpose of deciding whether they should get married or not.
My friend met a nice girl on e Harmony a few months ago. They started talking every day, and he has even visited her twice since then. They are trying to get to know each other enough to decide whether to not to move into a serious and committed relationship (see below).
In most cases, it involves a commitment to an exclusive relationship with the other person to make this decision.
Some couples will introduce each other to the important people in their life: parents, family, friends, mentors, spiritual community, etc. Some couples will try living together (the pros and cons of doing this are an entirely different blog post, and we are looking for someone to write intelligently about this so if you are interested in doing this, please let us know).
(Friends and family, if you could use these categories to identify your dating life then I will not have to ask awkward follow-up questions). If she doesn’t reply to your text, you don’t get upset. Sure, you can have fun, but the relationship has another purpose as well.
So for my own sake (and the sake of other nosy people like myself), I’ve developed 4 categories of dating to help clarify things and lessen the confusion surrounding dating. Dating to See Goal: Knowledge This type of dating is more intentional.
Some couples find it helpful to go to pre-engagement counselling. If you are in a courtship, you should be asking yourself, “What do I need to know about her and what does she need to know about me to be able to make this decision about marriage?
” When Olive and I were in this stage of dating, we found it helpful to give ourselves a time frame so that our decision-making process would not drag on forever.
You’re not trying to scope out the other person to see if they are marriage material. And friends spend time with each other to have fun.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating