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Lover of Verga Dear Cock-Loving Gabacha: Of course your guy is pinche loco — but so are all men of color.

Hombres complaining that their raza's women are dickmatized by gabachos while boasting about nailing gabachas is a trope as old as gabachos fearful that oversexed bucks and banditos were taking too many of their women.

I don't care if her name is super-hard to pronounce, like Xochitl. It's like what Maury says: "You are NOT the father," so stop asking her call you dad.7. Oh, it's cute that you think you have a shot in hell at winning. In Latino culture, turning down someone's food is the same as spitting in their face. If you messed up and we get mad, take responsibility.10.

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If she has relatives, for example, who speak very little English who want to speak to you in Spanish, and you know some, it's OK to try and bridge that gap. As in, if something happens to you that you don't want anyone to know about, keep that shit locked down deep inside, because if you tell her, everyone else will know by the end of the day too. But on the bright side: There's special occasions, so don't bank on it! " or attribute her behavior to just "being Latina." Follow Alanna on Twitter.

No one will be offended, and her family will probably appreciate it. There's no such thing as "casual." She'll be dressed to the nines no matter where you go, even if she's just picking you up from the airport. Please don't expect a home-cooked meal every night.

Dear Mexican: I see lots of Mexican-Americans struggling in grade school and high school.

Many Mexican-American activists claim it's because they don't speak English at home or the schools don't teach them well.

But I see lots of Asian-Americans in the same schools who do really well. The last time I went to a hospital, it seemed like Asians were 30% of all the doctors. Why is it that one group consistently does better than the other? Clueless Dear Gabacho: Because Mexican students are stupid, while Asian students are geniuses — that's what you and your ilk want to hear, right?

This pregunta always busts me up, because no matter how many studies activists can offer examining the myths of model minorities and Mexican apathy toward academics — variables, educational background of parents, socioeconomic conditions of neighborhoods, the quality of schools blah, blah, blah — Know Nothings dismiss the facts.RELATED:14 Things You Should Never Say to a Latina24 Problems Only Latinas Understand12 Things You Should Never Say to a Mixed Person Follow Tanisha on Twitter.out there, so when you make dinner reservations for 8, you might want to tell her to meet you at 7 (just in case). Commit these words to memory: "I'm on my way."No, no she's not.Tradition is stronger than anything and it has helped us preserve some interesting habits.People say they don’t really believe in this stuff, but keep doing it anyway. Pregnant women wear a little red ribbon or a safety pin attached to their underwear whenever there’s a lunar eclipse to defend their unborn child from astronomical maleficence.That said, I'm not going to dismiss the anti-negrito sentiment that still dominates the Mexican mind, especially when said negrito is dating a mexicana.

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