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He recently gave her a big squeeze in the corridor and she feels dirty. He's met with no resistance to his pattings and suggestions, so he's taking things a step further.
Sounds like a completely normal man to me, who thinks Mary enjoys this office flirtation, which he doubtless has no intention of taking further.
For all one knows he's got himself so far now that he's actually giving her squeezes out of sheer gallantry.
If Mary didn't like her bottom being patted why didn't she whirl round and tell him to get lost at once?
I have three children of school age (eight , 10 and 12 years old) and a husband who earns enough to keep us all comfortably.
However, lots of people ask me when I'm going back to work.
James Thompson, Welwyn Garden City, Herts Have a quiet word to stop it going any further Could Mary take her time to think just what to say and find a suitable moment to calmly have a word with him?
It could be done with good humour and even a slight smile.Or, if she's not spunky enough to react that quickly, she should at least have told him in a dignified way that she doesn't relish his behaviour one bit.As for feeling dirty, I think she feels dirty not because of his sexual advances, but because she allows herself to feel dirty.This dirtiness she feels is shame at herself for not standing up for herself, not dirt that a few sexual gropings can make her feel. This man's activity is fed by Mary's passivity, and while I wouldn't go as far as saying she brings it on herself, she certainly has not behaved like a grown-up woman if she's let him get away with it so far.After all, if a dog puts its nose up their skirt, few except the most paranoid of women would feel "dirty". No," Mary should say, as it were, as she pushes him away. Of course she could get him on a sexual harassment rap if she's so weak as to be unable to deal with this by herself." Mary must look him straight in the eye and say: "I mean it, you are not being funny or clever, and I've had enough." If it upsets Mary to confront the pest in this way, she must not be afraid to show that upset - a little emotion shows the sincerity of what she is saying, and can only result in the isolation of the perpetrator in the workplace.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating